Rule #84: No matter how many times Brett Favre retires he can always come back

Quick Hits:

• USC head coach Lane Kiffin released the depth chart for the spring game today. There are far less "OR"s than populated Pete Carroll's depth charts but several position battles were left unresolved, most notably middle linebacker. What we do know is that both Chris Galippo and Devon Kennard will see the field, Allen Bradford will be "the guy," and apparently things work backwards for Monte Kiffin safeties.
• Matt Barkley has looked impressive throughout the spring, enough to solidify his hold on the starting quarterback job. On the other hand it seems that center Kris O'Dowd had to pick up his game to impress the coaches.
• Tiger Woods missed the cut at Quail Hollow. Do you think he still wishes everyone would only pay attention to his golfing?
• Brett Farve Watch 2010 has officially begun. Does he need surgery? Will he retire? Is it even worth asking the question anymore?

Rule #71: Championships should be determined on the field, not in the polls

Quick Hits:

•  The NCAA selected a new president yesterday and already Mark Emmert is making headlines and worming his way into my heart. Not only is he on record as being a proponent of a college football playoff, but he wants to seriously address the issue of one-and-done players. Add to that the fact he hails from the Pac-10 and he supports the smaller expansion plan of the NCAA men's basketball tournament. I think we have a winner.
• Will they or won't they? At the beginning of the week we heard that JaMarcus Russell was as good as gone in Oakland, now not so much. The Raiders have 6.45 million reasons to cut a player who is, by every measure, a bust (Raider's fans rest assured, however, he still isn't the worst). But this is Al Davis we are dealing with, so when we see Russell on the sidelines next year in a black and silver jersey making an absurd amount of money to back up Jason Campbell, don't be surprised.
• Ted Miller has some excellent articles about USC quarterback Matt Barkley and head coach Lane Kiffin on his Pac-10 blog. On January 8th when it was first reported that Pete Carroll was leaving for the Seattle Seahawks did anyone expect to be this confident going into the new season without him? I certainly didn't.
• The U.S. National soccer team revealed their new home jerseys for the World Cup. Apparently the jerseys have two significant features. The first: they are styled after the jerseys worn by the 1950 team that upset England. The second: they are made entirely out of polyester recycled from water bottles.

Rule #8: It's not over until the fat lady sings

The fat lady sang for the Bulls and Heat yesterday.


And she might be warming up for another performance for the Oklahoma City Thunder after last night's demolishing at the hands of the Los Angeles Lakers.


The game ended 111-87, but if we're being honest the Thunder could have just cut their losses and hit the locker room when the Lakers took a 10-0 lead.


I mean, why even bother dealing with the embarrassment of missing your first 13 shots when it was clear the game was over with Andrew Bynum's first dunk.


If that wasn't indication enough that a beat down was coming then maybe the inclusion of Pau Gasol in the game plan should have sent Kevin Durant and company into the fetal position.


Even more than that, if Scott Brooks, the OKC coach, had any sense of mercy for his young players he would have forfeited the moment it became clear that Kobe Bryant was going to spend more time including his teammates than throwing up ill-advised shots for no other reason than - well he's Kobe and he can.


I may not be a fan of Los Lakers, but I know this: If Gasol gets involved OR Bynum plays like the dominant big man people keep telling me he is OR Kobe remembers that he plays for the Lakers and not the one-man-show Kobes...then the Purple and Gold are dominant.


AND if all three of those things happen all together they way they did in Game 5 then the Lakers are unbeatable.


The good news for any team that might face the Lakers going forward:


The Lakers are nothing if not inconsistent.


So Laker fans, enjoy this moment while it lasts. Because this is still the same team that lost two straight to a team that has as much playoff experience as a troupe of girl scouts. It's not a matter of IF they will revert back to that team, but WHEN.


But at least then you all can go back to blaming the refs. I know how much you all love that.

Rule #666: Never tempt superstition

I don't like to admit it, but I am a superstitious person.

Intellectually I acknowledge the insanity of it all (after all, how exactly does my wearing the right t-shirt make the players on my team play better?).

Still, I have learned that it's best to not test it.

Case in point: The Phoenix Suns.

I like the Suns. Steve Nash is my favorite player in the NBA and he has been for the better part of the last decade. I have been so excited to see them get back to their run-and-gun style and make it back to the playoffs.

Unfortunately I am not allowed to actually watch them play.

A few years ago I noticed that nearly every time I watched the Suns play, they lost. It became more and more apparent in the playoffs.

So I stopped watching and low and behold, they started winning (I tried a similar strategy with the Clippers but with no success. They lose whether I watch or not. I don't think they can help it).

Now, this year the Suns are facing the Portland Trail Blazers in the first round. Forgetting about the curse I watched the Game 1 - they lost.

Luckily, Game 2 and 3 - both Suns blowouts - were on NBATV, a channel I don't get and therefore couldn't watch.

Then a friend of mine (guess what team he roots for) forced me to watch Game 4 - and they lost again.

Wanna know if I watched Game 5?

I don't tempt superstition.107-88.

Rule #9: The Raiders will make absolutely no sense.

Rules are made to be broken.

Or at least, that's how it seems this year considering how the Oakland Raiders completely threw me off guard by not screwing up their draft this year.

And I wasn't the only one.

To the surprise of...well, everyone Al Davis' club didn't make the biggest first round reach (that distinction fell to the Jaguars or the Broncos depending who you ask) and continued to make uncharacteristically smart football decisions through out the three-day affair.

Maybe next year I won't go in expecting the Raiders to be completely illogical.......







Nah, who am I kidding, they'll find some way to mess things up again.

Rule #56: Blame Pete Carroll

I love you, Taylor Mays, but it seems you have fallen into the same trap that so many USC fans have been sucked into since that fateful January day when the news first broke that Pete Carroll was leaving the Trojans.

Blame Pete for EVERYTHING.

I can understand the frustration. Mays, a Seattle native, saw a perfect situation. His (beloved) former coach was now in charge of his hometown franchise, a franchise that would no doubt be looking for a Safety in the draft. Who wouldn't be excited to not only go home, but continue to play under the same man who mentored you in college?

It was a dream come true. A dream that was shattered by the name Earl Thomas.

A dream that was then beaten mercilessly into a bloody pulp by every pick that didn't end with the name Taylor Mays (35 to be exact).

So after nearly 24 hours of torturous waiting and wondering what he did wrong, Taylor vented:

Mays told the [Sacramento] Bee: "I definitely thought from the relationship we had, the things that he had told me about what I needed to be aware of with the draft process and things that I needed to do, I felt he told me the complete opposite of the actions that he took, which was definitely -- it was alarming. ... I understand it's a business. But with it being a business, he needs to be honest. And that's all I was asking for." 

Mays said Carroll told him "I didn't have anything to worry about, that my game was OK, that my backpedaling was fine ... my tackling was fine. It was all things that I asked -- what I needed to work on, what I needed to show. I was kind of led to think that I was going to be OK."

Here's the problem. Mays knew precisely what he needed to improve in his game if this LA Times headline from last year is to be believed:

Taylor Mays to return to USC

THE ALL-AMERICAN FREE SAFETY WAS PROJECTED AS A FIRST-ROUND NFL DRAFT PICK BUT SAYS, 'THERE'S SOME THINGS I NEED TO WORK ON THAT I THINK WILL REALLY HELP ME ELEVATE MY GAME.'

Those things that he needed to work on, mostly coverage skills, were the same things responsible for his draft free fall.

(That's not to say Carroll is completely without blame in this. If Carroll indeed told Mays that his tackling was "fine" then something was wrong. While Mays was one of the best hit men in college football, fans often bemoaned the fact that he had the frustrating habit of not wrapping up.)

In the end Mays needs to remember saying this:

"I can't say I want to come back so I can take Spanish 2, but I just think it would be best for me in the long run," he said. "It might affect making a million dollars right now but hopefully in 10 or 20 years I'll look back on it and be like, 'That was the right decision.' "

Live by those words Taylor. They mean as much now as they did then.